The weekend before my wedding

Alright, so, I am finally here, wedding dress hanging in my dressing room, just looking at it gives me chills. Aaaahhhh so many things have happened since that day. 1st June, 2010 aaawwww I had so many expectations for the day, such high expectations, but do you know how when you feel you're about to reach levels of happines you haven't reached before and then there's this red light in front of you saying: "Stop!! Sorry, you're not allowed to enter here"??? Well, that's what happened to me.
The week before my wedding I was in such an over-excited state and my mind kept shouting at me "hey!!! You're gonna be Mrs K in a week!!! AAAAHHHHH!!!! Even published that same AAAAHHHHH in a Cosmo Forum, where the girls were so very supportive and nice to me. Bless them.
Anyway, things is that on the weekend before we were supposed to leave for our Gretna Green-Anvil Hall-fairy-tale wedding, so we were rushing everywhere looking for shoes for my fiancé's sons (which was the only thing we needed) so we went to the Trafford centre in the morning but couldn't find anything. Now Between you and me, I just think he just didn't want to buy them in front of me as the ones we saw were too expensive. lol
Well, we went back home and I could feel a tingle all over me, but a good one. So we go back home but he goes back to the trafford centre to get the shows whilst I stay home and finish packing. Things are fine and everything's soooo exciting. I think: mmmmm, tomorrow we're all gonna be in Scotland. His parents will look after the kids so maybe we can go and do something interesting or get some dinner on our own in a romantc place, don't know. So many things crossed my mind then.
I rang Pam, my mother in law, but her husband picked up the phone. I asked him if i could have Mandy's number as my wedding dress was in her house. I heard him breathing strangely, but I didn't want to say anything as people can be a bit weird in this country when you ask about their helth too much. So, I got the number and I tried ringing but there was no answer. An hour or two later my husband rang to say that his step-dad wasn't felling well and that they were going to the hospital. Everything was alright, and I shouldn't worry. Those were his words.
Then the cold bucket of water. He'd had a massive heart attack and died. He was such a lovely man. Someone so caring, someone who for no reason at all welcomed me into his family and was always concerned with my well-being. I still miss him. I had actually asked him to give me away as my parents weren't going to be able to be there with me. And he was gone, just like that. He had his Sunday roast dinner and then gone.
The next morning we went to see Pam and of course she was devastated. I still remember wer eyes when she told me: "I can't believe I will never have his arms around me anymore". We said good bye and set off to the lake district to pick up the children and head to Scotland.